Beta Blocker

I’ve never been
Quite this relieved
From feeling so
Utterly hopeless
When living in fear
Of each heartbeat
Now losing their strength
More and more;

These arrhythmias
Breaking that pulse,

Finding misery
Closer to freedom,

Beyond what breath
Remains fleeting
While clutching my chest
Late at night –

Where God Himself
Wouldn’t pray
Near windows cracked
Along bedsides

Still ignoring words
Barely whispered
Those lonely streets
Never hear

Under fading lamps
Like our own
Watching burning bulbs
Get extinguished

After bearing light
Over decades
Letting surges
Bring them relief

Through electric
Taken by mouth
Sharing answers
Tragedy beckons
If swallowed whole
Before eating
Letting medicine
Numb every nerve

During episodes
Happening fast

(Merely real
But hardly accepted),

Almost comfortable
Knowing death’s coming,

Swearing pills
Will work very soon.

  • J. Pigno

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